An Introvert Living in an Extrovert World

Until this year, I would have told you I was an extrovert (borderline introvert). But I am quickly learning that I was very wrong about myself. And I think maybe that's because I wanted to be perceived as an extrovert. Drawing energy from others, enjoying time with big groups of people is desirable in our culture. It has a more positive connotation for someone to be an extrovert. Introverts are cursed with being seen as rude or shy, when really we just like to take in our surroundings. I've seen more and more memes about introverts, and though they are funny, extremes, there is a lot of truth in them. 

Part of the acceptance I've come to is from understanding myself more and how I function. Before, I was so determined to be extroverted and someone who was the life of the party. However I've recently come to understand that I'm not ever going to be the life of the party, chatting with everyone and making jokes----and that's okay. While I used to love being in big groups of people, I'm way more into small groups or even one on one time. I like getting to know people and I'm not the kind of person to have serious conversations around a group of more than like 4 people--and even that's pushing it. 

Also, on one of the web images I've seen, it explained that introverts give energy and extroverts take energy. It's a system, and I really like that image. However, sometimes (like this weekend) I give more energy than I have and it drains me--and I've recently learned, can make me kind of cranky. Fortunately most of my close friends are introverted also, which works well for us because we can be low key, but still together. But there's some extroverts in there too, taking the energy we are giving off. Again, a system...kind of like photosynthesis.

I'm sure there's more to say about this, but I write this to say two things. 

First to the introverts out there:

It's okay not to be the life of the party. That doesn't mean your a grump, you just give energy and need to participate in different ways. Learn how you personally work, because I firmly believe there's a scale and levels of introversion.

To the extroverts:

Don't be taken aback if an introvert is quieter to you some days than others. We may have given more energy one day than another, it doesn't mean we are mad at you. And be kind to the introverts in your life, not sucking too much of their energy! It's all about balance and learning how to deal with someone different from you.

Just some suggestions. I personally don't feel like I fit neatly into these things, but some people do more than others.