For the past two summers, I have been given the opportunity to work as a youth intern with a youth group in my hometown. It has been a tremendous blessing and I am still in awe that I got to do it not only one, but two summers! I have got to see those teens grow and be challenged by different things in their life, and have truly come to love them more than words can say. I also am excited to be doing a different internship this summer with a new group of teens, and cannot wait to come to know them in a way that I have my OLY kids!
In my time working with teenagers, although I am not far removed from being one myself, I have noticed that I am more sensitive to the things teenagers are encountering. From the tv shows they-and even I-watch to the clothes they wear and the messages our culture feeds to tweens and teens. My heart breaks knowing that they are being fed some of the same lies I was when I was their age-lies that so many others older than me have experienced. And I have spent the past few months just having that unsettling feeling eat at me. I speak directly to my OLY teens in my statements, but I also want to shout a proclamation to any other teens out there when I say these things.
Maybe these will be helpful to you, maybe you have other things to struggle with, but I felt the need to share some tiny bits of wisdom from someone who was just there not long ago. When I graduated high school, my church-on Senior Sunday-had us leave a bit of advice from our experiences to those kids still in the youth group. So maybe that is what I am trying to do: share some advice from my experiences, especially now that I have been out of high school for a few years and have been able to reflect on the person I was throughout my teenage years.
1) Embrace your quirks!
Once you accept that you are weird and that's okay, others will accept it too. In case you hadn't heard, WE ARE ALL WEIRD!
Just look at some of the most popular celebs now (Ex: Jennifer Lawrence).
Our favorite famous people are our favorites because they have accepted that they aren't always gonna come off as cool, and that's totally okay! Everyone has stupid moments-I have had more than my share today alone. So accept those weird things you like to do, don't be afraid to say you like something because you think other people will judge you, and move on with life. People will respect that you know yourself well enough to know what you like, and aren't just trying to impress others. You were created to be a unique person-crooked nose, ant farm collection, odd sense of humor and all. In the words of my favorite poets "That's what makes you beautiful." Embrace it!
Just look at some of the most popular celebs now (Ex: Jennifer Lawrence).
2) Being 18 does NOT make you an adult.
Trust me on this-I am almost 22 and I can't even tell you
that I've fully reached adulthood. You will learn that there is no checkpoint for when you really
feel like an adult (or so I hear). I have heard so many teens utter the words "I'm 18, technically I'm an adult and I can make my own decisions." Or even worse, "I can drive, I'm responsible now." No, you're not. I'm not.
So check the attitude at the door, accept that you are not fully ready to make adult decisions, and enjoy not having the responsibility that comes with adulthood while you can.
Wish someone had drilled that into me when I was a teen.
3) Don't lose your love for reading.
This may seem like a silly thing to share, but I have rediscovered my love for reading, and maybe its because I live with education majors who constantly talk about how important reading is to development, but I wish that I had never stopped. I would make a nice little bet that most teens were like me and as soon as reading became a requirement for school, you stopped liking books and (admittedly) spent a good number of nights on PinkMonkey or SparkNotes.
Which is wrong, don't use SparkNotes...
[Parent moment: do as I say, not as I do. Okay, glad we're past that.]
But I urge you guys, find books you like-take time on the weekends or instead of sitting back watching TV or Netflix-whatever newfangled mode of entertainment you kids have these days-and dive into a book you enjoy. Books are cool. Trust me.
Reading takes you on more adventures than any movie ever can (and I am definitely a movie lover). There is nothing like living in book-world for however long it takes to read one. It seeps into every part of your life and you almost forget you're not actually living in book-world. It's GREAT! Plus books make you smarter. I can tell a difference in how I talk to other people, how I do on assignments in school, and how I think when I have been reading more frequently. So try it out. Go find a good book and chill in a library instead of on the couch one afternoon. Besides, one day, you'll be a twenty something year old, sitting in a coffee shop reading your new favorite classic literature book and meet the person you're going to marry. So that's always a plus.
4) Don't waste your energy on popularity.
First of all, popularity is incredibly relative (if you don't know what that means, Google it.)
Find who you enjoy being around, who makes you be the person you want to be, and stick with them. It will be more beneficial in the long run anyway. Friendships are such an important part of life, especially as a teenager. And that makes friendships a very fragile thing. As much as you don't want to admit it, bad friends will make an impact on you. Not that you can't be friends with everyone, but your inner circle will affect how you view life and how you feel about yourself and others. So be careful who you let into that circle, and realize that sometimes you have to cut strings with friends who don't influence you in the best ways.
Secondly, don't waste your energy trying to impress those "cool" people. It is distracting from actually finding out who YOU are as a person when you are trying with everything in you to fit into what their mold of cool is. Don't wait til later to really sit down and figure out who you are. That is something I never looked at until I was in college. I "thought" I knew who I was in middle school and high school, but I was really just trying to be acceptable enough for other people. And like I said in #1, spend time figuring out how to to accept your quirks. Ask what your strengths AND weaknesses are-not just your strengths. Figure out what you want to do with your life-not just career and college wise either. What are some things you want to accomplish in life? Even if they're absolutely bonkers, aim high! Maybe you'll never go to the moon, but it's fun to dream about it. Figure out what YOU want and who YOU want you to be.
That's a much better use of your energy than the negativity of trying to impress someone else.
I personally think teenagers are some of the most powerful people in the world. You guys just need some refocusing and encouragement! Enjoy the time you have as a teen-you're more responsible than a child, but not quite as responsible as an adult. It's the best of both worlds!
So check the attitude at the door, accept that you are not fully ready to make adult decisions, and enjoy not having the responsibility that comes with adulthood while you can.
Wish someone had drilled that into me when I was a teen.
3) Don't lose your love for reading.
This may seem like a silly thing to share, but I have rediscovered my love for reading, and maybe its because I live with education majors who constantly talk about how important reading is to development, but I wish that I had never stopped. I would make a nice little bet that most teens were like me and as soon as reading became a requirement for school, you stopped liking books and (admittedly) spent a good number of nights on PinkMonkey or SparkNotes.
Which is wrong, don't use SparkNotes...
[Parent moment: do as I say, not as I do. Okay, glad we're past that.]
But I urge you guys, find books you like-take time on the weekends or instead of sitting back watching TV or Netflix-whatever newfangled mode of entertainment you kids have these days-and dive into a book you enjoy. Books are cool. Trust me.
Reading takes you on more adventures than any movie ever can (and I am definitely a movie lover). There is nothing like living in book-world for however long it takes to read one. It seeps into every part of your life and you almost forget you're not actually living in book-world. It's GREAT! Plus books make you smarter. I can tell a difference in how I talk to other people, how I do on assignments in school, and how I think when I have been reading more frequently. So try it out. Go find a good book and chill in a library instead of on the couch one afternoon. Besides, one day, you'll be a twenty something year old, sitting in a coffee shop reading your new favorite classic literature book and meet the person you're going to marry. So that's always a plus.
4) Don't waste your energy on popularity.
First of all, popularity is incredibly relative (if you don't know what that means, Google it.)
Find who you enjoy being around, who makes you be the person you want to be, and stick with them. It will be more beneficial in the long run anyway. Friendships are such an important part of life, especially as a teenager. And that makes friendships a very fragile thing. As much as you don't want to admit it, bad friends will make an impact on you. Not that you can't be friends with everyone, but your inner circle will affect how you view life and how you feel about yourself and others. So be careful who you let into that circle, and realize that sometimes you have to cut strings with friends who don't influence you in the best ways.
Secondly, don't waste your energy trying to impress those "cool" people. It is distracting from actually finding out who YOU are as a person when you are trying with everything in you to fit into what their mold of cool is. Don't wait til later to really sit down and figure out who you are. That is something I never looked at until I was in college. I "thought" I knew who I was in middle school and high school, but I was really just trying to be acceptable enough for other people. And like I said in #1, spend time figuring out how to to accept your quirks. Ask what your strengths AND weaknesses are-not just your strengths. Figure out what you want to do with your life-not just career and college wise either. What are some things you want to accomplish in life? Even if they're absolutely bonkers, aim high! Maybe you'll never go to the moon, but it's fun to dream about it. Figure out what YOU want and who YOU want you to be.
That's a much better use of your energy than the negativity of trying to impress someone else.
I personally think teenagers are some of the most powerful people in the world. You guys just need some refocusing and encouragement! Enjoy the time you have as a teen-you're more responsible than a child, but not quite as responsible as an adult. It's the best of both worlds!
No comments:
Post a Comment